Story of a little Girl

It's 3 am I am still awake
Waiting for my heart to stop beating
Trust me it's not a love story
It's a story of darkness, defeating
the purpose of life.
shadows of forgotten mistakes
coming back to haunt me
the world stops spinning
for a moment, and I see
a mirror in front.
it shows me my true self
telling the truths i don't want to hear
a scary figure comes out of it
asks me to surrender while my fear
takes over my spine.
I ask it to stop with all my vigour
The whole room fills up with my screams
I hide under my disregard for life
making sure it doesn't see the dreams
that are concealed inside me.
It leaves me to live another day
And that makes the story of a little girl
Trying to survive the bitterness
hidden inside us like a crooked Pearl.
                                         -Sudipa Adak

Kya Baat .. Kya Baat

Main kalakaar
Tu bhrastachaar
Par tu sikhaye mujhe Rashtrabaad
Kya baat kya baat...
Jo main bolu tu sahi nahi
Tera banar sena mujhe pite wahi
Aur puche mera jaat paat
Kya baat kya baat
Is sawal ka na koi jawab hai
Ke deshbhakti kisse udhar le
Par mange tu praman din raat
Kya baat kya baat
Yeh tere jumlo ka jo khel hai
Sahi wahi jo isse jhel le
Har sachai ko tu de maat
Kya baat kya baat..

Chal batlaye tujhe sach aaj
Na darte ham us jail se
Jo soche sangbidhan ek khel hai
aur beizzat kare use din raat
Samajhle yeh baat..
                        - Sudipa Adak 

Its all in your head

'Ha ha ha' let's laugh about it
I mean what's that 'depression' shit
It's all in your head
Go out, make friends you are not dead
Be thankful that you are privileged
Trust me
'IT'S ALL IN YOUR HEAD'
Yes, it's all in my head
The darkness, the demons
The heartbreaks and tension
It's all inside
Wrapped with a lack of attention
They throw themselves at me
Come headfirst, when no one can see
They are sneaky, like termites
But you hide them like love bites
Immortal, as always
They are invisible, inexorable
Trust me much more horrible
Than everyone says
So stop judging
Stop telling me how I should feel
I have more problems to deal
And they are not imaginary
The actual word is 'scary'
That's what it is, so listen
To the people you love
Hold their hands tight,
When things get tough.

Hold their hands tight,

When things get tough.

the chinks in our armour

I have given it all, to the voices in my head
telling me i am nothing but a fool
Just a nobody in the sea of nobodies
Pretending to know it all, trying to be cool.

The hardships exist like railroads
They reach way too far but never move
Strech their arms as much they can, and
the eternal silence becomes their groove

The friendships are all temporary
part of the elaborated stunt called life
The myths and the facts preserved inside
like sacred honey inside a beehive

The sweet essence of darkness
the intoxicating presence of destiny
The incompetence, not at all liberating
but an understandable tragedy

We are imposters to our ownself
the symptoms are all so subtle
The chink in our armors are malignant
way too much to win the battle.

- Sudipa Adak

I AM

They love me, they love me not

Either way i am enough 

They scare me, they scare me not

Either way i am tough 

Short hair, big boobs

Long hair, flat chest

No matter how i look

When i am me i look the best

Married with two kids, or

Single mother with a lover 

May be i am just a girl for now

Anyway it is my territory to discover 

Love a boy or a girl, 

May be swing both ways

it is totally my choice 

I will do what my heart says

The mother, the sister, the daughter

I am whatever i want to be

If i do no harm to anyone 

It's no ones business, you see!

"Good girl" or "Bad bitch"

Labels are for cowards to give

I have wings to fly and horns to fight 

with a heart full of desire to live.

    

                                 -Sudipa Adak

At the end

There, you see the line
You will find humanity in it
somewhere in the middle
Hungry and thirsty, also scared a bit

Mother nature is distributing tickets
For something called the D-day
Asking about the parts we played here
and none of us got anything to say

You might rebuke me for saying all these
Cut my head off if you can
But you know you have nothing to do
Cause out of time we have ran

Believe me, i would love it
If you prove me wrong
Take a step back, rebuild, give us
A society that is strong

Where there's love and hope for all
Where greed is not a thing
Where we all are just humans and do
not have lebels attached with a string

Jawab mange ga waqt tumse

jawab mange ga waqt tumse,
Puchega ga lakho sawal
Pahechane ga tumhe
Tumhare kaale kartuto se
Rakhega yaad har insaan ka haal

Jagega har wo rota hua baccha
Sunayega har un maa baap ki chikh
Charo aur se sawal aayenge
Jawab mangte huye
Kiu na diye tum unhe jaan ki bhik

Jo duba hai, use pahechanta hai wo
Jo dubaya hai use bhi
Hai khara nanga waqt
Haat liye lahu un sabka
Aage barte huye milega wo tujhe hi

Aankh main aankh daale
Utarega kapra aankh se
Pochega har ek ke
Ruh pe laga hua daag
Un jale huye makano ke raakh se

jawab mange ga waqt tumse,
Puchega ga lakho sawal
Pahechane ga tumhe
Tumhare kaale kartuto se
Rakhega yaad har insaan ka haal

                                 - Sudipa Adak

Good old days

Let's go back
To the days of books, toys and friends
This world is way to dull
And tired of ever changing trends
The hours were long
But eventful,i may say
The expectations were less
And mind as clear as day
Good old days,
Memories build of stars
Let's go back to those days
When our hearts had less scars

We all have hopes up and guards down
for people that peel the layer of our heart
We fail at times,Act like a clown
But all it takes is a fresh start
Clean slate,We all learn
Take steps back and evolve
Breathe, and wait for our turn
for The life's mystery to solve
For some of us it's way to late
Some of you still have cards unturned
Waiting for the right moment to call
Taming your emotions, poker face on
Believe me take a leap and you won't fall

Ever Been in love?

Have you ever been in love
Not the one like 'i will buy you gifts'
The one where you keep loving
No matter how far away they drift

You build stories from the scratch
Take walks down the park
Sing at karaokes and dance
Until the sky turns dark

Been there? For how long?
Long enough to not forget
Strong enough to not let go
Even though many you met

Its beautiful isn't it,
Beautiful memories wrapped in scars
Turning the pages down the lane
As you count the stars

Shaken,broken,
Mistaken for something else
Something more glittery
Same old, same old misery

We have all been there,
Wounded souls with flesh to show off
We have all been there
Broken hearts with beats that don't stop

Ham na rukenge

Tum daraoge
Ham phirbhi larenge
Tum rokoge
Ham aur aage badhenge
Goli sau chalaoge
Ham khare hai sina taan
Laakh maaro hame
Denge hambhi jaan
Par na rukenge ham
Chalte rahenge
Haath main liye sangbidhan
Jai bhim jai bharat gayenge
Tum khoon bahane ayoge
Ham usi khun main nahayenge
Ham jai bhim jai bharat gayenge
Tum daraoge
Ham phiribi larenge
Tum rokoge
Ham aur aage Badhenge

CHECK MATE

I'll not wait for the night to eat me up
Nor will think of the day to save me
I'll jump off the clif if that's what it takes
For this World a better place to be

I'll cut off ties from whoever holds back,
Fly my kite underneath the mighty Sun
I'll take down my guard if needed
but won't forget at times to blaze the Gun

I'll be the savior when you want me to
Will take on the evil forces as i go along
I'll be best and worst for what it's worth
I'll not be the toy who just sings one song

I'll question everything that is done
I'll not take oppression as a fate
I have had enough of your mockery
Now it's time for the pawns 'check mate'

Takes only one for love to show

Let's burn the walls down,
Let us make bridges instead.
It doesn't matter who have hurt you,
One drop of beat and we can be dead.

There is no point to nurture
the ghosts of failed friendships.
Let us make the bridges strong
and burn the walls to crisp.

Make the apologies heard
Take the sorry as you go,
It takes two to fight but
only one for love to show.

                                        - Sudipa Adak

Sawaal

Mandir main shiva dhund loge
Masjid main khuda dhund loge
Thori dur isa bhi tumhe mil jaye,
par bina dhunde insaniyat,
kya raza dhund loge?

Mazhab meri puchoge
Kafir mujhe bula loge
Naam hamari uchaloge
Par puche sawalo ko kaise taaloge?

Subha ko kaato ge raat se
Insaniyaat baantoge jaat se
Par yaankin ko kaise loootoge?
Roko ge kitne haath se?

Har us khamosi main,
Bhar ham lakho sawal denge.
Ham har nafrat ke andhere main
Mohabbat ka ujala daal denge.

Desh mera lut chuka hai

Dur khare hai Sangbidhan ke rakhwale
Naqab posh atankio se dara hua.
Choutha stambh yaha khare puche hame
Do chaar maar pari to kya hua?

Ho to tum deshdrohi,
Wo kya kahete hai 'Urban naxal' ho
'Azaadi' mangi thi tumne
Ye lo british jaesa atyachaar lo

Gaddi main baitha bole
Vaat mango, jaat denge
Aur police yaha khara bole
Saath mago to laath denge

Mangna hai to hinsa mango
Puri tumhari fariyaad hogi
Usse zyada kuch na mango
pta hai na kya uske baad hogi?

Chikho ge chillao ge par
Lath parenge baar baar
Jitna bhi tum afsos jatao
Aur niche girenge ham lagataar

Durachario se hame hai matlab
Wo hamare karyakarta hai
Maathe pe jinke haath hamare
Wo thori na kisise darta hai

Chalo saaf karo yeh raasta
Raja ji nange ghumne wale hai
Tum aankh bandh karke baitho
Dekho ache din ke ujale hai.

Dear me

I know you have been through a lot
The more you gave the less you got
But you never stopped to get going
You stood up and ran again
You cheered through thousand pain
As you kept on growing

You have missed the hugs you wanted
You wished for you to drop dead
But never stopped living
You had lots of tears to shed
But bigger smiles you chose to spread
You chose to master the art of giving

Thank you for loving yourself
and not waiting for any validation
Thank you for waking up every day
and not giving up to any limitation.

Mubarakho Hame Hindu Rashtra hua hai

Suno suno dhol tashe baj rahi hai waha
Dhum dhaam se khusi man rahi hai yaha
Mit gaya wo, jo bhi hame jorne ko aya hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Bhuke the,nange the, ghut rahi thi dam
GDP bhi aaye din ho rahi thi kam
Par
saare milke nafrat ka fasal zarur boya hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Pradushan se ghayel tha pura awaam
Ghar baithe yuva ko bhi mila nahi kaam
Par
hindu khatre main the ye sabne jana hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Betio pe atyachaar, desh baitha hai lachar
Golia nahi,bas mange the hamne bichaar 
Par
Sachai bhul hamne bair ki mangi dua hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Pyaaj bike saib ke bhao, baazar me
Bhuke pet  baccho ko yeh maarte
Par
Masnad pe baithe ko koi na chua hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Sachai ke kilaaf kitni dalile hui pesh
Kissan mar te the,chup tha yeh desh.
Par
nafraat ki boli sabne barabar sikh lia hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai.

Kataar mai khara dekho Gantantra bhi
Ghusbaithio main aaj uska naam ji
sanvidhaan ka sar bhi aaj jhuka hua hai
Mubarakho hame hindu rashtra hua hai

Once upon a time there lived a girl

Once upon a time there lived a girl
She weighed too much,wasn't very tall
Had her issues, you can name any
Flaws you say? Well she had many

She had bullets in her brain
Mental illness that they call
Guess,she got hit by a train
and had a great fall

Couldn't read, couldn't write
Got Big 'F' in all the tests
Had future no bright
And yet she rests

Like a big fat queen that she is,
Cause she ain't got any ass to kiss.
And Free from your judgment she lives
As zero is the amount of fuck she gives.

Get me that sunshine

Get me that sunshine,
wrap your heart around mine.
Let me get the hang of it,
Even if it's just for a bit.
I will take that piece to my grave,
just this time i will be brave;
will take the rabit out of the hat
and let your soul catch that.
I will not at all take things slow
As I don't want to miss that flow
Not for second, for a minute but eternity,
you, i and love  will make a damn trinity.

Bhuk hame manzoor hai saahib

Bhuk hame manzoor hai saahib
Bas goli khila do dharm ki
Japte rahe ham aaphi ka naam
Hame na parwa karm ki

Arth-niti se hame kya matlab
Aadhe to bas hindurashtra chahte hai
Baaki aadhe wo bhi andhe
Unko bhi bas bibaad bhahte hai

Masnad pe jo baithe ho raja
Sikka ucchalo ham nachenge
dhil do tum nafrat ki rassi ko
Ham chup rahe to zarur bachenge

Gaer mulko ko gaali dedo
Hame do wakt ki roti na sahi
Ham yaha baithe taali maare
Aakhir Deshprem to hai wahi

Chautha stambh  bik gaya hai
Par dushman hamare parosi hai
Galti hami se ho gai hogi
Kisne kaha aap doshi hai

Aaphi to hai param pita
Hamare aap rakhwale hai
Bhuke pet bhajan na hoye
Par ham kaha rukne wale hai

Aankh bandh,kaan bandh
Bas lete rahe ham aaphi ka naam
Chahe kitni bhi sacchai sataye
Aapko bhajte rahe ham subho shaam.